occasionally I have days, Usually when I am sleep deprived and feeling particularly unattractive, where I ask myself questions like am I date-able? or am I marriage material? I think this is a question all single people ask themselves every now and again, hopefully not super frequently, because you should really not over dwell on that, but it is a good thing to consider every now and again if improvements in your character and personality can be made.
I had this confirmed tonight as not just a girl problem when a guy friend of mine (not who all you out here are thinking I promise, it was a surprise one.) texted me to ask if he was Date-able. In conjunction with this topic, a few days ago I had a discussion with a friend about how sometimes I feel like I spend all my time and energy having fun and socializing, and I wish I had something of more importance to do with my life, like take care of cute little kids of my own.
My friend at this moment chose to point something out to me, and that is, if I want to get married and have kids, then right now I need to be having fun, socicalizing, and developing talents so someone wants to marry me. basically she said, I am doing what I need to, and publishing it on facebook and in blogs is really a form of marketing. Previous to that I had mentioned a conversation with another friend. Last week this other friend mentioned how people like to make up stories and talk about her and her personal life, because she doesn't share that with them.
What I learned in my studying of political science is that interacting with others is politics, whether it is trying to get something you want from someone else, trying to convince the opposite sex to date you, or marry you, convince people to be your friend, or to not be friends with your enemy (if you have enemies, I don't), or just trying to get people to spend time with you, or help you do your calling and give a lesson, all of it is politics.
we need conflict resolution skills just as sharp as the U.N., We must do P.R. as great as any ad agency. I must be as good a spin doctor as any politician on The Hill. If I don't want people to fill in the details of my personal life with those they imagine, I must give them enough to satisfy human curiosity, but not so much as to be TMI, and then they will leave me alone. If I want someone to date me, or be my friend I must present myself as such a person as people enjoy spending time with. now, all of this may seem a bit fake, but in reality you can be your total real self, and be honest, but you do not have to show your whole self to everyone all at once.
Being single you must master self-marketing, putting forth your best qualities, and improving upon them constantly so that they are seen, and taking your worst qualities, and editing them out of your life, and your strange qualities that you want to keep, and keeping them only for your VIP club of most trusted friends and associates, because if you want to keep those qualities, the person who you marry, and your closest friends will have to love that part of you, but sometimes its best to take your time and see if they can be trusted with those most sacred parts of your personality, rather than "casting your pearls before swine" this is my observation this week.
So my single friends, good luck, as my friend told me that night, being single is a part time job. time to forget yourself and get to work, and go have fun till you drop, just make sure you post it on Facebook, so those nights you went to things even though you wanted to stay home, sleep, and be a hermit are not in vain. But remember, the most important thing is to become like the kind of person you are looking to marry, to become like the kind of people you want to be friend with, because as it says in Doctorine & Covenants 88:40 " For intelligence cleaveth unto intelligence; wisdom receiveth wisdom; truth embraceth truth; virtue loveth virtue; light cleaveth unto light; mercy hath compassion on mercy and claimeth her own; justice continueth its course and claimeth its own; judgment goeth before the face of him who sitteth upon the throne and governeth and executeth all things."
I had this confirmed tonight as not just a girl problem when a guy friend of mine (not who all you out here are thinking I promise, it was a surprise one.) texted me to ask if he was Date-able. In conjunction with this topic, a few days ago I had a discussion with a friend about how sometimes I feel like I spend all my time and energy having fun and socializing, and I wish I had something of more importance to do with my life, like take care of cute little kids of my own.
My friend at this moment chose to point something out to me, and that is, if I want to get married and have kids, then right now I need to be having fun, socicalizing, and developing talents so someone wants to marry me. basically she said, I am doing what I need to, and publishing it on facebook and in blogs is really a form of marketing. Previous to that I had mentioned a conversation with another friend. Last week this other friend mentioned how people like to make up stories and talk about her and her personal life, because she doesn't share that with them.
What I learned in my studying of political science is that interacting with others is politics, whether it is trying to get something you want from someone else, trying to convince the opposite sex to date you, or marry you, convince people to be your friend, or to not be friends with your enemy (if you have enemies, I don't), or just trying to get people to spend time with you, or help you do your calling and give a lesson, all of it is politics.
we need conflict resolution skills just as sharp as the U.N., We must do P.R. as great as any ad agency. I must be as good a spin doctor as any politician on The Hill. If I don't want people to fill in the details of my personal life with those they imagine, I must give them enough to satisfy human curiosity, but not so much as to be TMI, and then they will leave me alone. If I want someone to date me, or be my friend I must present myself as such a person as people enjoy spending time with. now, all of this may seem a bit fake, but in reality you can be your total real self, and be honest, but you do not have to show your whole self to everyone all at once.
Being single you must master self-marketing, putting forth your best qualities, and improving upon them constantly so that they are seen, and taking your worst qualities, and editing them out of your life, and your strange qualities that you want to keep, and keeping them only for your VIP club of most trusted friends and associates, because if you want to keep those qualities, the person who you marry, and your closest friends will have to love that part of you, but sometimes its best to take your time and see if they can be trusted with those most sacred parts of your personality, rather than "casting your pearls before swine" this is my observation this week.
So my single friends, good luck, as my friend told me that night, being single is a part time job. time to forget yourself and get to work, and go have fun till you drop, just make sure you post it on Facebook, so those nights you went to things even though you wanted to stay home, sleep, and be a hermit are not in vain. But remember, the most important thing is to become like the kind of person you are looking to marry, to become like the kind of people you want to be friend with, because as it says in Doctorine & Covenants 88:40 " For intelligence cleaveth unto intelligence; wisdom receiveth wisdom; truth embraceth truth; virtue loveth virtue; light cleaveth unto light; mercy hath compassion on mercy and claimeth her own; justice continueth its course and claimeth its own; judgment goeth before the face of him who sitteth upon the throne and governeth and executeth all things."
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